My Friend, Missy Morgan

Missy Morgan is my friend! I say that to make a point…
The fact that I cannot physically see her doesn’t end our relationship..
It will continue because now I see her through the eyes of my heart…

Last year, I stumbled across a sentence that made me question God…
“God created the Heavens and Earth—all you see, all you don't see.”
Gen. 1:1
All we see and don’t see? What in the world does that mean?
Why would God’s choose these words to be His first words written to us in the bible?
My question led me to a very comforting answer … That has opened my eyes to see “the unseen things”. They taught me how to see what I don’t see…. So I can live with what I do see….

If truth be known, I was a teensy bit afraid to be Missy’s friend.
Why?
Because I didn’t want her to ever know the pain I knew.

Who would have ever dreamed that Missy Morgan’s and Julie Peck’s paths would cross?

A mother who had just lost a son and a mother whose greatest fear was to lose a son.

I remember the week we first met. It was June of 2006, our first time serving at the “Lighthouse”. Smith suggested that we go because a good friend of his … thought the mission of the lighthouse reflected the heart of JSP’s newly birthed vision. Another reason ….that wasn’t mentioned, but clearly understood by both of us… was personal..
We were also going because we learned early on…while traveling our own journey of grief …..That somehow…. helping others helped us… It demanded our full attention which forced our eyes to focus on something besides our own pain.

The Morgan’s were returning to the lighthouse to enjoy their 2nd visit. The year before they had been had served by an amazing family, “The Howards “who are still their close friends today. They also experienced meaningful connections with caring volunteers.
But, most importantly they connected with fellow warriors who were also battling cancer.
I am sure that Missy came to have fun, to be loved on, to rest and relax and enjoy much needed time together with her family.
I came to serve, make new friends, fold and wash clothes, make beds, and to hopefully make life a little easier that week for a family who needed a break from late night hospital check in’s because someone had spiked another fever..

What happened when our paths collided with our own agenda’s?

Let me take you behind the scenes...

30 min before we met the Morgan’s I decided to take a moment to learn about Ryan’s cancer. My eyes had never seen the word neouroblastoma before. I walked into my room, closed the door turned on the television, and grabbed my paperwork hoping to find a definition to this word. Needless to say, I could not find the medical dictionary that I thought may have been included. Somewhat satisfied with not understanding, I heard a voice on the television that by chance had been turned on to a show that was explaining the history of Alex’s Lemonade stand. Alex had neoroblastoma too…. Wow what a coincidence…. As I listen I became quickly aware of the weight this word carried. It didn’t take too long before I found myself crying in my bedroom asking God “Why”….I know that day I was unaware of the why.. But God was not..

It was no coincidence that Missy and I became friends the summer of 2006. God orchestrates our lives- “From one man he made every nation of men that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live.” – Acts 17:26
It is no accident which neighborhood you grew up in, who lived next door, who went to school with you, who is part of your church, and who works with you. Our relationships are appointed by God, so there’s every reason for me to believe that our friendship was appointed by God as well and it will continue in Heaven. God’s plan doesn’t stop on the Earth- Friendships that begin here on Earth will continue in Heaven.
When God said, “It is not good for man to be alone” –Genesis 2:18, He was speaking not only of marriage but also of the need for friendship. He was saying, I’ll make these people so that they’ll need one another.”
Did we need one another? I surely didn’t think so... But as the week came to an end, I forced myself to confess my past to Missy and she said back to me… “Julie, I am not sure why, but I know in my heart that we were suppose to know one another”
I am thankful today for our friendship. It was not always an easy one… we did have many moments of laughter and I am very thankful for that.. But we also had moments that I brought me to my knees..
I will never forget the conversation we had sharing lunch at the McDonalds’ located across the street from Scottish rite…
“Julie, I never planned on having cancer… I never planned on my son having cancer” she said as she casually took a bite of her “Fish Filet” my reply … honest silence ….because none of us plan for the bad… there were no words to offer … just a look that offered love.
Or the conversation we had this past November at Emory hospital. As she was waiting to be released by the doctors to go home… she turned to me and said… “I guess I will get to meet Jackson...”
That was Missy Morgan for you.. Always looking at the glass half full…and speaking the truth! Her honesty gives me peace today. With that statement she gave me assurance of where she was sure that she was going… and I cannot wait to see her again..
As I reflected this week on our friendship I remember something that happened the day after Jack died. I just happened to open my bible which I had never opened before on my own....My eyes fell to a page that had been scribble on by Jack… The verse I read was Isaiah 43:10 it said…
“You are my witnesses and my servant, whom I have chosen..”
June 2006, Missy and I agreed to begin a relationship. A friendship forged between “two soldiers” on the battlefield of life. Our Mission, that was unknown at the time… was to witness to one another. Missy witnessed to me a life lived to the fullest no matter what the circumstances were… I witnessed to her a life that could be restored and lived again to the fullest no matter what the circumstances were… Nothing can ever replace the loving relationship we shared while fighting the heart breaking battles of this life.
I know when I get to Heaven I will remember my experience of fighting side by side with Missy Morgan in trenches of this fallen Earth.
She has had and will continue to have a profound influence on my life.
I will miss her greatly …. Until we meet again!

“We have not lost our dear ones who have departed from this life, but have merely sent them ahead of us, so we also shall depart and shall come to that life where they will be more than ever dear as they will be better known to us, and where we shall love them without fear of parting.” – Augustine

"I hoped that you could understand, This is not what I had planned" - Love God

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This past week has brought many tears. I have watched my friends, The Morgan Family "bear the unbearable". My heart breaks back into a million pieces to see this family (who witnessed to my family selfless love for one another)loose a mother, wife and son. Death is once again waking others to the reality of this life.
After walking 5 years through my own heart shattering event, I have learned many truths that have filled and binded it back together again. I must admit that this week's events have tested the cords that bind my fragile heart. Fear came back again pointing it's bony finger in my face. It made me question all that I believe to be true today.
Once again, God put my fears to rest and reassured me of His love for me. He also gave me the strength to do what I have done so many times before.... reach out and break the bony finger fear keeps waving in my face! I laugh because I know the doctor who tends to my fear has to be out of finger splints by now!

I wanted to share a song that spoke to my heart as I tried to out-run my grief on the running trail yesterday. I pleaded with God for an answer.... and this is what He said........

Listen and enjoy.."More Time" by needtobreathe (I posted the words below)

God bless all who are like me -struggling to understand-
Love,
Julie

More from JASMiNE_JUiCY14 at Myxer

God Say's:
"I promised you the world again
Everything within my hands
All the riches one could dream
They will come from me

I hoped that you could understand
That this is not what I had planned
Please don't worry now
It will turn around

Cause I need more time
Just a few more months and we'll be fine
So say what's on your mind
Cause I can't figure out just what's inside

I hoped that you could understand
That this is not what I had planned
Please don't worry now
It will turn around

Cause I need more time
Just a few more months and we'll be fine
So say what's on your mind
Cause I can't figure out just what's inside
So say alright
Cause I know we can make it if we try
Cause I need more time

Just a few more months and we'll be fine

We're off to new lands
So hold on to my hands
It's gonna be alright
It's a whole lot brighter
So stand by the fire
It's gonna be alright
Yeah, the road gets harder
But it's not much farther
It's gonna be alright
You know that it ain't easy
Please believe me
It's gonna be alright

Please don't worry now
It will turn around

Cause I need more time
Just a few more months and we'll be fine
So say what's on your mind
Cause I can't figure out just what's inside
So say alright
Cause I know we can make it if we try
Cause I need more time
Just a few more months and we'll be fine"

God Has Won!

"The Master himself will give the command. Archangel thunder! God's trumpet blast! He'll come down from heaven and the dead in Christ will rise—they'll go first. Then the rest of us who are still alive at the time will be caught up with them into the clouds to meet the Master. Oh, we'll be walking on air! And then there will be one huge family reunion with the Master. So reassure one another with these words." 1 Thessalonians 4:16 MSG

I was dreaming this morning of what it might be like when Jesus comes back for us. One of my favorite vision's is ... On the day of Rapture, Jack will be riding back with Christ. He will be upon His shoulders, with his hands in the air shouting "Mom,Dad, Macie and Maddie ... I have missed you so much...It's time to come home!!!" What a day that will be! When Christ returns for "the ones" left behind. I made a little video of what it might be like... enjoy

# 1 Reason Your My Best Friend.....

"We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies…he who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with Jesus."
(2 Cor 4:8-11)



Now that's a BFF... Someone who finds you when your lost. I tend to get lost every now and then.. so it brings me peace to know I have a friend like Jesus. Over the past 5 years, He and I have become pretty close friends. He and I have shared the good, bad and the very ugly parts of life together. I have to say that it's been the ugly parts of life where I've gotten to know him best...

We are told that we will know Jesus better by sharing in His sufferings. What does it mean to share in His suffering and why is it so important to share? Bottom line- He is the only one who has the cure for the "ugly" parts of life. I truly believe, I never would have seen the importance of this great pearl of wisdom without suffering an UGLY that the world could not cure.


There is no "cure" for death. Think about it ... Have you ever attended a school fundraiser or benefit dinner or joined a cause on facebook that wanted to raise money to cure death. I am aware that we raise money to stop things that cause death.. but once it happens there is no turning back. We are forced to deal with the effect's, too many to name. I would rather get to the point....heap them all together and you get one big pile of "suffering".

Suffering is hard. Doctors have no magic pill to make it easier.. Oprah has not aired a show that reveals a way to avoid the effects of suffering.... The President has not issued a new stimulus package to help move us through it faster. My opinion, the worlds solutions for suffering only prolongs it and make it worse. They may offer short term relief, but rarely do they move you forward to find hope.

Hope is the "cure" for suffering. My hope is knowing Jack is in Heaven and this suffering is temporary. What has opened my eyes to this hope? The words spoken by my friend, Jesus Christ. A true friend that shared in my suffering. His love found me when I was alone and hurting. He waited patiently with me, at each stage of grief ,until I was ready to move forward. Not forcing His way on me led me to asking questions?

How did Jesus suffer? He suffered gracefully ... Why? because He himself is grace. His example to me of how I should suffer allowed me to see just how much He loves me. He gave his life so I could have hope to see Jack again! What else could I ever want? So,to share in His suffering is a no brainer... It is my honor!
As I join with Him by faith, He extends the grace I need to heal. This does two things ... It allows my suffering to be transformed by grace into something sweet that can be offered to another that is also suffering. My hope is to always be working out death so the sweetness of the son of God can be ushered in and offered out...

Jesus, thanks for sharing life with me....
your friend- Julie Peck

I must give thanks to "Ozzy" for the inspiration today...

"We have to form habits to express what God's grace has done in us. It is not a question of being saved from hell, but of being saved in order to manifest the life of the Son of God in our mortal flesh, and it is the disagreeable things which make us the exhibit whether or not we are manifesting His life.
Do I manifest the essential sweetness of the Son of God, or the essential irritation of myself apart from Him?"

"Lost"

"For the Son of man is come to seek and to save that which was lost." luke 19:10

Have you ever felt lost? I mean the kind of lost that makes you feel like you've been stranded out at sea. After we lost Jack, I found myself on a ship setting sail for the island of "Lost"!
Grief has the ability to take you to that place called "Lost". The battle required to defeat grief's grip on "the ones left behind" is the most deadly part of death. Returning to life after the loss of a loved one is still uncharted territory.
"You know there is a 90% divorce rate for couples who lose a child." This is one of the first statements a couple hears from a counselor after their loss. Which by the way is uncalled for! I say, let's let the couple pull themselves together from the first major blow life just delt them. However, the reality is most families are torn apart because they lose hope. Living with hope deferred makes the heart sick. It also leaves you feeling lost.
Have you ever thought that "lost" may be the very place you need to be? In "Pirates of the Caribbean at worlds end", The captain of the ship is trying to pump his crew up for the next part of their journey. One that they need to take to find something of great value. The journey requires that they go through a storm to a place they have never been before. They question him about the necessity of the path. His reply to them.."Sometimes you have to be lost to find the places that can't be found." Which brings me to why I love the scripture above... "Lost" is the very place we can find a savior. Jesus came to save the lost! The thief comes only to steal, kill and destroy but Jesus came that we may be found to live our lives more abundantly!
Finding your way out of "Lost" will look much like a Hollywood pirate film. It will be filled with adventure, suspense, bloody battles, and will end with a love story. The love story will be how God's love saves and rebuilds your family from His word... Always remember His promise to us...
"I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt." Jer 31:4

Headed twords hope!
Julie Peck

"Word's on air"

"Fools are undone by their big mouths;
their souls are crushed by their words"- Proverbs 18:7 (MSG)

I am always surprised to see how God work's in my life. I have just enough knowledge about God to be dangerous. Dangerous in good ways and bad ways. Today, I was "dangerous in a good way". Only because I choose to look first at God, instead of looking first and staying focused on my troubles. Let me explain...
Yesterday, a new storm rolled in. It was a blizzard of "Uncertain Circumstances". The problem was, the last storm hadn’t cleared up yet. I wasn’t sure we could handle any more snow!
I am sure you can relate! We all go through a "winter season" in our life that seem to have more than its fair share of problems and heartache. Entering into my 5th year of winter, I was hoping to catch a glimpse of spring. Instead, I got another blizzard.
A couple of years ago I wouldn't have taken the news of the oncoming blizzard very well. I would have worried and complained about it to all that would listen. However, this morning was different. With just enough knowledge to be dangerous, I knew God needed to be first in line to listen.
As I prepared for my morning quiet time, I remembered that I needed to put a load of clothes in the washer. Quickly, I ran down stairs to complete the chore. As I was pouring the laundry detergent in the washer I thought about how thankful I was to have a washing machine and detergent. I reminded myself that I do have a lot to be thankful for. So, I made a decision to thank God for everything I could thank Him for during the day. I figured this would be the best way to get back at Satan for trying to use this new blizzard to smother me. Word's of gratitude! That would be a good weapon! I ran back up stairs, happy about my plan of attack, ready to start my quiet time.
I just started a new study, "Can we talk?” by Priscilla Shirer. The study teaches you how to have conversations with God by reading His word. Eventually this would re-train me to rely more on the Spirit. Well, I am here to say day one worked. The spirit was at work and I was listening.

My assignment was to read James 3:8-11.
"but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt[a] water flow from the same spring?"

How funny to read about the dangers of the tongue!" I had just made a decision to retaliate against my enemy today with praises to my Lord and Father. This trilled me so I dug a little deeper to see if there was anything else God wanted me to know. What I learned was I had to take action, to make a decision. How was I going to react to the uncertain circumstances? Was I going to allow Satan to use my tongue to dispense "deadly words of poison"? Or, would I allow the Holy Spirit to use it to dispense the "antidote"- "truthful words of life".
God also showed me that the enemy loved the blizzard that had just come into my life. The cold weather normally shuts me down and fills my heart with despair. One of the enemy's greatest weapons is my tongue that speaks from my heart of total despair. If I choose to give my tongue to him at this moment it will spew poison that will cause injury, illness and death to my loved ones. However, if I choose to give my tongue to the Holy Spirit during the blizzard I could speak words of life, hope and encouragement that will actually melt the snow!
The blizzard that came in so suddenly I thought was here to teach to "let go" again... But actually it was here to show me the fruit of a sanctified heart, "My words": Matthew 12:34 says that "out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." The key is out of the abundance of the heart, that is, "what is in the heart?"-
God was in my heart! Finally! I have been running hard after Him for the past 4 years begging for understanding. Now I understand. His ways do not always make sense, but they are always for the good of those who love Him. Today, I made the right choice. I gave my tongue to God and He poured from my heart words of life that would offer words encouragement to those little ears around me that I love so much!
Thank you God! You are so good!
Julie Peck

Do you see the Jesus in you?

Do you see "Jesus" in you?

"And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit." 2Cor. 3:18 ESV

When you look in the mirror do you see the Jesus in you? I feel like that kitten looking in the mirror, not sure I agree with what I see. Really, if you think about it, we are all so uniquely made by our Heavenly Father, put here on this earth with the intent of being transformed to the image of His son. I never thought about it before, me- being transformed to the image of Christ.

One reason I never entertained the thought was because I compared myself to other Christian's. I could never be that good! You know those kinds of people. They are so good at teaching, memorizing and serving. I kept comparing myself to the way "she" did things not realizing that God never intended for me to be like "her".

If God put us all here, on this earth, for this particular generation, to live in our small town with specific and certain people.. With my unique personality because He placed me in the care of two particular people... Then the Jesus in me is not going to look like the Jesus in you. Am I right??

"The Lord GOD has given Me the tongue of disciples, That I may know how to sustain the weary one with a word. He awakens me morning by morning; He awakens my ear to listen as a disciple."Isaiah 50:4

We are being transformed to the image of Christ through our trials and sufferings... to be able to speak a "word" to the weary.
My trials are much different than "hers". So, what a freeing moment for me!!! My Jesus may look and sound "a bit" different than yours, but we are all speaking the same "word".

Ok, so what I am trying to say is... We all speak the same language, but are able to speak to certain people God has granted us opportunity to speak to...
Wow!! How exciting to know that My God has placed me here and put me in a certain environment to learn how to speak a certain "word" that will help the one that is weary!!! Praise God! There is a purpose and a reason why we are all here!

What one word do you have for the "one who is weary" on your particular path of life????

Love you all!!

Julie Peck