"And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they loved not their lives even unto death."- Revelations 12:11 ASV
I wanted to post today for two reasons.. 1. To share my testimony of how "The Lord works all things for our good" this is how we conquer the evil one and his affects on our lives. 2. I promised The Lord a long time ago that I would document this journey ... And now we can all share in seeing His goodness in the land of the living..
One memory that stands out in my mind as I look back is one that I had during a Beth Moore conference. She asked the audience, " Who are you mad at?". I sat for a moment and then I heard my answer loud and clear.. I'm mad at satan... The fallen selfish angel... who because he could not have his way... Is trying now to destroy my way. His attack on us from the very beginning of time was to make us believe we could not trust God.. That He was holding out on us.. That He was keeping us from all things good. This was and is the same lie that He uses to temp us all .. Especially when we walk through suffering.
At the beginning of my journey I was not a Christ follower. I believed He existed but I did not believe His heart was good for me. I just believed if I could somehow do enough good things that it would keep His eye off me and by the sheer grace of God I would make the cut to enter into the pearly gates ... Comparison helped me justify this.. I mean I wasn't nearly as bad as some of the others I witnessed .. And surely they were making the grade curve low enough so I could squeak in... Right?
This was such wrong thinking...
As I look back and remember today ... Yes, It is filled with heartbreak and sorrow but today it is also filled with so much joy and peace too.. I have a tradition that I like to to do every 23rd of December ..I like to go back and read in the bible that Jack scribbled in..
It was a bible I had never read before this time in my life. I had never opened it to seek any guidance or hope... But for some reason I opened it the day after jacks accident and was amazed by what I saw.. Jack must have known I would be looking for hope.. And so he scribbled on the chapter of Isaiah 43 .. For many years I read this and found comfort but I also found pain.. I felt like God was telling me.. I have chosen you to tell a story of how someone makes it through tragedy.. So pull up your bootstraps and get to it.. My heart was always a little sad because I didn't want this mission.. But I would do it if I had to.
This past year as I read the chapter I saw it in a whole new light.. I saw it as a love letter that Jesus was sending me from above... He knew I was going to be walking through great tragedy and this was Him telling me He would never let me go..That is was His job to make the story worth telling.. not my job to tell a story of just tragedy but of redeeming love and restoration of lost and heartbroken lives.. It would be Jesus' work to give me a new heart and mine job to share what a life looks like after being carried and cared for through the storm.. Its been a long journey but one that has changed my life forever and for good:)
I wanted to add the pictures today to show you just what the Lord wanted me to know as I walked through the past 9 years..He pursued me even when I was not pursuing Him...My favorite lines I will Highlight below.. take them them to heart if you need hope today.. there is enough to share.. The Lord is good.. He is faithful and will be your Shepard.. Your Companion .. and your friend .. He will never let go of your hand...
It was a bible I had never read before this time in my life. I had never opened it to seek any guidance or hope... But for some reason I opened it the day after jacks accident and was amazed by what I saw.. Jack must have known I would be looking for hope.. And so he scribbled on the chapter of Isaiah 43 .. For many years I read this and found comfort but I also found pain.. I felt like God was telling me.. I have chosen you to tell a story of how someone makes it through tragedy.. So pull up your bootstraps and get to it.. My heart was always a little sad because I didn't want this mission.. But I would do it if I had to.
This past year as I read the chapter I saw it in a whole new light.. I saw it as a love letter that Jesus was sending me from above... He knew I was going to be walking through great tragedy and this was Him telling me He would never let me go..That is was His job to make the story worth telling.. not my job to tell a story of just tragedy but of redeeming love and restoration of lost and heartbroken lives.. It would be Jesus' work to give me a new heart and mine job to share what a life looks like after being carried and cared for through the storm.. Its been a long journey but one that has changed my life forever and for good:)
I wanted to add the pictures today to show you just what the Lord wanted me to know as I walked through the past 9 years..He pursued me even when I was not pursuing Him...My favorite lines I will Highlight below.. take them them to heart if you need hope today.. there is enough to share.. The Lord is good.. He is faithful and will be your Shepard.. Your Companion .. and your friend .. He will never let go of your hand...
Israel's Only Savior
43 But now thus says the Lord,
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
3 For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.
I give Egypt as your ransom,
Cush and Seba in exchange for you.
4 Because you are precious in my eyes,
and honored, and I love you,
I give men in return for you,
peoples in exchange for your life.
5 Fear not, for I am with you;
I will bring your offspring from the east,
and from the west I will gather you.
6 I will say to the north, Give up,
and to the south, Do not withhold;
bring my sons from afar
and my daughters from the end of the earth,
7 everyone who is called by my name,
whom I created for my glory,
whom I formed and made.”
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
3 For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.
I give Egypt as your ransom,
Cush and Seba in exchange for you.
4 Because you are precious in my eyes,
and honored, and I love you,
I give men in return for you,
peoples in exchange for your life.
5 Fear not, for I am with you;
I will bring your offspring from the east,
and from the west I will gather you.
6 I will say to the north, Give up,
and to the south, Do not withhold;
bring my sons from afar
and my daughters from the end of the earth,
7 everyone who is called by my name,
whom I created for my glory,
whom I formed and made.”
8 Bring out the people who are blind, yet have eyes,
who are deaf, yet have ears!
9 All the nations gather together,
and the peoples assemble.
Who among them can declare this,
and show us the former things?
Let them bring their witnesses to prove them right,
and let them hear and say, It is true.
10 “You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord,
“and my servant whom I have chosen,
that you may know and believe me
and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
nor shall there be any after me.
11 I, I am the Lord,
and besides me there is no savior.
12 I declared and saved and proclaimed,
when there was no strange god among you;
and you are my witnesses,” declares the Lord, “and I am God.
13 Also henceforth I am he;
there is none who can deliver from my hand;
I work, and who can turn it back?”
who are deaf, yet have ears!
9 All the nations gather together,
and the peoples assemble.
Who among them can declare this,
and show us the former things?
Let them bring their witnesses to prove them right,
and let them hear and say, It is true.
10 “You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord,
“and my servant whom I have chosen,
that you may know and believe me
and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
nor shall there be any after me.
11 I, I am the Lord,
and besides me there is no savior.
12 I declared and saved and proclaimed,
when there was no strange god among you;
and you are my witnesses,” declares the Lord, “and I am God.
13 Also henceforth I am he;
there is none who can deliver from my hand;
I work, and who can turn it back?”
14 Thus says the Lord,
your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:
“For your sake I send to Babylon
and bring them all down as fugitives,
even the Chaldeans, in the ships in which they rejoice.
15 I am the Lord, your Holy One,
the Creator of Israel, your King.”
your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:
“For your sake I send to Babylon
and bring them all down as fugitives,
even the Chaldeans, in the ships in which they rejoice.
15 I am the Lord, your Holy One,
the Creator of Israel, your King.”
16 Thus says the Lord,
who makes a way in the sea,
a path in the mighty waters,
17 who brings forth chariot and horse,
army and warrior;
they lie down, they cannot rise,
they are extinguished, quenched like a wick:
18 “Remember not the former things,
nor consider the things of old.
19 Behold, I am doing a new thing;
now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
and rivers in the desert.
20 The wild beasts will honor me,
the jackals and the ostriches,
for I give water in the wilderness,
rivers in the desert,
to give drink to my chosen people,
21 the people whom I formed for myself
that they might declare my praise.
who makes a way in the sea,
a path in the mighty waters,
17 who brings forth chariot and horse,
army and warrior;
they lie down, they cannot rise,
they are extinguished, quenched like a wick:
18 “Remember not the former things,
nor consider the things of old.
19 Behold, I am doing a new thing;
now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
and rivers in the desert.
20 The wild beasts will honor me,
the jackals and the ostriches,
for I give water in the wilderness,
rivers in the desert,
to give drink to my chosen people,
21 the people whom I formed for myself
that they might declare my praise.
22 “Yet you did not call upon me, O Jacob;
but you have been weary of me, O Israel!
23 You have not brought me your sheep for burnt offerings,
or honored me with your sacrifices.
I have not burdened you with offerings,
or wearied you with frankincense.
24 You have not bought me sweet cane with money,
or satisfied me with the fat of your sacrifices.
But you have burdened me with your sins;
you have wearied me with your iniquities.
but you have been weary of me, O Israel!
23 You have not brought me your sheep for burnt offerings,
or honored me with your sacrifices.
I have not burdened you with offerings,
or wearied you with frankincense.
24 You have not bought me sweet cane with money,
or satisfied me with the fat of your sacrifices.
But you have burdened me with your sins;
you have wearied me with your iniquities.
25 “I, I am he
who blots out your transgressions for my own sake,
and I will not remember your sins.
26 Put me in remembrance; let us argue together;
set forth your case, that you may be proved right.
27 Your first father sinned,
and your mediators transgressed against me.
28 Therefore I will profane the princes of the sanctuary,
who blots out your transgressions for my own sake,
and I will not remember your sins.
26 Put me in remembrance; let us argue together;
set forth your case, that you may be proved right.
27 Your first father sinned,
and your mediators transgressed against me.
28 Therefore I will profane the princes of the sanctuary,
