Saturday, April 27, 2013

My Hope as a mother

Thought of the day: Fasting Hopelessness

My hope as a mother
I don't have to be perfect
just simply surrendered




I remember the first time I simply surrendered to Christ. 
It was moments after my sweet Jack went home to be with Jesus.
I was not aware at that time what was actually taking place in my heart. 
Looking back today, I see so clearly. 
Moments after we were told that Jack did not survive I began to pray.
My prayer was, Lord I am tired of wondering where I will go when I die. I want to settle this issue with you once and for all. Lord, I am not sure how this works.
 I just want to know from now on that I am yours
and
I am returning to my home in heaven because I want desperately to see my son again

 I was confessing that I was tired of trying to be perfect.
and admitted I needed a savior.

You see what brought about that prayer was the thought I had in church every Sunday before this very moment.
 The thought was, I wonder if Jesus remembers me?
I had been baptized at the age of 10 but thought the life I lived from that point on was a huge disappointment to God.
I had made many mistakes in my life and felt like God didn't really like me or even notice me.
 I just couldn't measure up.
My only hope was to remind Him each Sunday that I had been baptized as a child so my name should be on the guest list when I reach the pearly gates..right????

I was never settled with my salvation because I somehow thought I had to earn it by being perfect.
Truth is we will never be perfect. That is why we need a savior. 
I asked the Lord the other day to show me where He was that night Jack went home to heaven. He showed me a picture of Him with His arms around me holding me. He said, Julie I love you and have always loved you.. It's time you settle that once and for all. You cant earn my love. I love you simply because you are mine.. not because of what you do or what you have done. You have never disappointed me because I am never disappointed. I stand outside of time and know every detail about your life even the ones that disappoint you. Simply surrender to me and I will be the perfecter of your less than perfect life.
My hope is 
Christ in me.
I have learned that the most perfect me is me radically pursuing Jesus.. 
and it looks like this
A mother who stopped trying to be perfect 
and 
just simply surrendered to the only one who is perfect... 
Jesus


Jesus, help us surrender ..
Bring back your wonder
Bring back your song
I got it all wrong
I've pushed you down deep in my soul to long

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

A Prayer for the grieving heart

I wanted to share this wonderful prayer that expresses our hearts during times of grief.
written by Steve Stockman





In a week like this

LORD, we come to the end of another week 
Except that it hasn't been just another week
It has been the worst week of our lives
and even worse for some
LORD, help us to be Honest, Vulnerable, and somehow Hopeful in the reflection of our feelings.

LORD, we have been shocked
Shocked by how one tiny second can tear our lives apart
Shocked by how far humanity can fall
Shocked by how callous and painful our actions can be, how low we can stoop.

LORD, we are grieving
Grieving for the loss of lives with so much love and energy still to give
Grieving for the man and woman and child we will never be able to to hold again
Grieving that our history is so sad and twisted.

LORD, we are confused 
Confused at why this should happen
Confused about how this should happen to the innocent
Confused about where You and Faith enter into these events.

LORD, we have been angry
Angry at why we allowed our family and friends to go shopping 
Angry at how evil people could rip our world asunder
Angry that you allowed it to happen.

LORD, we are seeking
Seeking some kind of feeble consolation in the midst of our deluge of tears
Seeking some kind of Hope that good might come from this evil
Seeking your spirit, Whom Jesus called a Comforter, to whisper into our Maddening Silence.

LORD, we are squinting for Faith
Faith that the majority might have some kind of a say in the future
Faith that Love will end our Hate, Good will end our evil,
and Grace will touch our broken hearts
Faith in a God who is as angry as we are
and who is reaching out His hand to us.

LORD, we are remembering
Remembering those who today can no longer be shocked, grieved, be angry, be confused, seek or squint for faith
Remembering that you watched as your Son, covered in blood, died at the futile whim of injustice
Remembering that His death is the only thing we can grope after in the dark of a week like this.

LORD, we have planted our loved ones deep in the bloody earth of Ireland this week
We have watered them with our tears
LORD, may You allow them to be seeds of a LOVE that will grow into our Peace.
LORD, Remember us.
Amen.
The Thin Line - Steve Stockman

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Hope is God can handle what I can not

Thought of the day: Fasting Hopelessness

Hope is God can handle what I can not


The statement above is a lie. 
Its a subtle lie, because it's one word that makes it a lie.


Its just how the enemy works. 
Did you know that the enemy can not "create" anything new. 
He can only manipulate what God creates. 
The enemy has no power to create and that is why he loves to subtly change truth into lies... 
with just one word. 
The saying, "God will never give you more than you can handle" comes from 

1 Corinthians 10:13
and its often misquoted.


"No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.”







This verse gives us much hope, but it does not say that God will not “give you more than you can handle.” It’s talking about temptation only – that we will not be tempted beyond what we can endure. 

This is an important lesson to learn.

For people to think they are somehow protected by God from “too much” suffering is a dangerous, false teaching. In fact, He sometimes uses suffering to get our attention.
Its been my experience and saving grace that there are things in this life that I can not handle. I have sat at the door of death and wondered how am I ever going to make it to my next breath. 
Truth is if it were up to me in those moments I would have chosen to quit and go on up to heaven. I would have never made the choice to stay and endure. I can testify that not me but God in me handled those choices. 
When we admit we can not handle the hard things in life it allows God to handle them. 
I wanted to pull out my soap box this morning to debunk this lie!
 If we don't see the sublet setup for failure we will live in defeat , guilt and shame for not being strong enough or wise enough. 
Kelly Clarkson even has it half wrong
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger"
Is only true if you were carried by God through it. 
If you still need proof, Hebrews 11:7-40 should paint a pretty good picture for you. 
My guess would be that the Hero's of faith never thought they would endure their calling if God himself didn't carry them through. 
Noah would have never known how to build a boat big enough to carry on the human race. Yet, God gave him every dimension of the boat when he depended on God.

Abraham and Sarah would have never been the parents of many nations in their own strength at 100 years of age. Only God can do that..
Joseph would have never been able to endure 13 years of prison and slavery with out God carrying him through to see his dreams come true. 
Moses would have never delivered the Israelite's from Egypt without the
"I Am" with in him. 
And there was Job, who question God, "Who are you?" and God carried him while He answered his questions.. He restored to Job more than he had lost.
And lets not forget Jesus,
who could not carry His own cross with out God carrying Him to defeat death ..
They did this together so we wouldn't have to do it alone!
I could go on, but I think you get the point. 
My hope is that we will all know the truth and it will set you free to hand over what you aren't expected to handle on your own.

I love you Jesus!


Heart

Thought of the day: Fasting Hopelessness


Hope is believing Love never fails



The picture above describes to me the battle we are in..it's over our hearts. 
The hands below are of this earth. They are the hands of the enemy constantly trying to steal away our hearts. My focus then moves to the all consuming fire that surrounds the heart. Could that be Gods love consuming protecting our hearts from the thief? In this world you will 



Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.