Brave

Great Spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
- Albert Einstein

 

Have you ever thought that a particular season of suffering in your life would never pass. It seems like I have been through many  trails over the past 7 years and I began to think this would be my life. As if there was  a poster with my face on it and the caption read, "Poster child for enduring".  It really felt as if God was picking on me... but I have come to understand the God was picking out of me ways of thinking that held me back. I came to realize this over the past year.

 It began with examining my thoughts. 


"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

2 Corinthians 10:5 NLT

clue's of what I realized that my thoughts did not line up with Gods truth. My reactions to current circumstances became the evidence and the needed change. 

Our nature always bears witness to what we believe in our hearts. 

At first, my nature was to hunker down and lower my expectations, so I could be satisfied by merely surviving. Then I would find myself fighting in my own strength to manipulate the circumstance so it would end the way I needed it to. Both ways of thinking were motivated by fear...hmmm..not of God! 

"There is no fear in love." - The Apostle Paul

First clue, my motivation of fear needed to be changed to a motivation of love! It seemed foolish at the time to hope again for a good ending, but I believe that is what God was calling me to do. My new nature was calling me to hopeful remembrance and new vision. 

"The world can be kind, and it can be cruel. It can be beautiful, and it can be appalling. It can give us good reason to hope and good reason to give up all hope. It can strengthen our faith in a loving God, and it can decimate our faith."

- Frederick Buechner

As I looked back in remembrance of the past 7 years, a lot has happened. I could look at two ways, the old way (motivated by fear) or in a new way (motivated by love) A lot of destruction, or could it be clearing away things that hindered me? It is easy to look through the eyes of fear at all of the evidence before you to assume all is lost. It's also not very hard to find others who will agree with you. Settling for less is so easy after you present your case to all who will listen. Their response is always agreement with sympathy, "Oh my, you have been through so much, you deserve a break. I would never get out of bed if I were in your shoes." This response invites me to a world of apathy that cause's me to live as a victim. In this world we are focused on our circumstances and the pain they cause. This is the wrong focus because it never allows us to look above them to trust the one who is in control of it all. Think about it, there is more than enough suffering in the world..it's overwhelming! It will keep us in a merry-go-round cycle all of our life ..If we let it. It comes down to choice. 

You choose!

A victim never thinks they have choice. They believe that bad things just happen and they have to deal with it. It's really the path of least resistance. 

Choosing to hope requires courage, vision and patience.

I'll share a time where remeberance and new vision helped me look up to trust in love instead of looking down to fear. We had just moved into our new home last year. The move was an unwelcomed circumstance in our life, but Gods finger prints were all over it. The house we lived in ten years prior to the move  was located on Battlefield Road, our new home is now located on Stillwaters Drive. ..hmmm,  makes you think. I believe that God was making a clear statement to our family that our season of battling was over. It is now a new season of stillwaters, rest. It has not been an easy transition of thinking. Often, I find my thoughts drifting back to the old way of thinking. It happens when we have new struggles. I want to agree that we will always struggle, but I know God wants me to agree that He is bigger than my struggle.

When we moved into the new house, we  decided to get a new puppy. We needed something that prompted us to love. We adopted a sweet dog and her name was jewels. She brought much joy to our house. It is amazing how a dog can remind us of what  "unconditional love" looks like. A small but welcomed change in our house. Jewels was part bulldog, and part beagle. Her nature was to hunt. If she caught a scent she was easily lured away from the safety of our yard. Yep, again she was lured away and hit by a car. She took her last breath as we brought her back to the house. I know dogs get hit by cars everyday.. no big deal. This was a big deal for me. All we were looking for was a little happiness.. and this had to happen? Really, God? Here we go.. I guess I am the poster child for suffering. As my thoughts gravitated to this way of thinking, I remembered thinking.. no, we live at stillwaters now! This is a time of rest and regeneration! I will not agree the enemy.. My thought was never again will I go through this.. no more grief .. no more dogs! Then I felt hope calling out from my heart, no, I do want another dog. She brought so much love and joy to our home. This desire was motivated by love, not fear...It took courage to stay with that hope, but I'm glad I did. Today we have a new puppy, Bella, and she has brought hope, faith and love back into our home and hearts. I'm learning to lean on hope these days and that is making all the difference. 

This snapshot reveals a glimpse of what hope looks like. It takes courage to enter into this reality.  It requires us to envision something that is not there yet. If you have something already, you don't need to hope for it (Romans 8:24). And can you see how hoping causes us to love in ways that would not be possible without a new vision of what might be? The anticipation of hope is always life giving.

"Love bears all things, hopes all things, believes all things, endures all things"

-1 Corinthians 13:7