I love you this much!

Real love stories never have endings.
--Richard Bach

I love this quote! As I look forward to tomorrow’s celebration of Valentine’s Day, I find myself both happy and sad. It reminds us all that we love and are loved. Have you ever thought about the best "I love you" ever expressed to you personally? Was in 4th grade when your crush gave you a "Huge Hershey Kiss" at lunch so all your friends could share in the excitement? Was it the first valentine spent with the one you would spend the rest of your life with? Was it when you got to experience the day with your kids, oh how they love to celebrate this sugar filled holiday! I really love all my memories of celebrating the ones I love. Now days it is especially hard knowing one has moved on and I cannot physically wrap my arms around him to show him how much I love him. The flip side of this revelation is I have come realized what the most important "I Love You" has been for me. It has been "The Cross". The biggest I love you I ever got was the day Jesus died on the cross. On that day God shouted.... "I Love You This Much!!" This thought brings me to a memory I have of being a child. My grandmother used to ask me, "How much do you love me?" and I would reply by stretching my arms out as far as they would go behind my back and say " I love you this much" ... as much as my 4 year old arms could give...
Wow... just like our God.... He stretched out His arms as wide as He could and said “This Much"... He gave as much as He could give to show us just how much He loves us! Tomorrow as you show your loved ones how much you care... remember to give as your Father has given... Love with no end!
Happy heart day.. Smith, Maddie, Macie , and Jack!
Love,
Mom

25 Random Things About Me?

Have you been asked to do the "25 Random Things About Me" on face book yet? I fianlly gave in, sat down and made myself do it. It was a challenge! I thought I would share....

1. I said I was not going to do this, but here I am!.. (Hmmm...Could this be the theme of my life?!)

2. I love to laugh! Laughter has put my heart back together. I have learned through my grief that "laughing" is the way I "cry" best. (Watching "Arrested development" and "The Office" helped during my deepest days of grief... of course after I spent many hours talking to God.. ) Instead of bringing flowers and chocolates to lift my spirits, Smith would rent me the full season episodes of my favorite funny shows and I would watch and laugh for hours.. ) God has to have the best sense of humor.. I can't wait to meet Him!

3. I secretly want to be a standup comedian.. But I'm not really that funny. I know this because my kids tell me so...

4. I love to do crazy, "out of the box" things daily. It makes life fun. It helps balance my natural tendency to be too serious. In fact this year I have taken a stand against the sadness in my house. 2009 is the year of FUN!!!!!

5. I love God, my husband Smith of 18 yrs. and my children Maddie, Macie and Jack more than I ever thought possible. I have learned that you really don't know how much you love someone, until they are gone. Lesson learned... Now, I know!

6. If you told me 5 years ago that I would be a contemplating which bible study to do next.. I would have called you crazy! Never in my life would I have imagined being so taken by God's word. I love the way He has showered me with Love and Compassion and through that I have learned to see His truth, which initiated for the first time in my life, real life change in me! (I know that was a really long "run on sentence". Please forgive me. HA!)

7. I bet most of you did not know.... when I was 18, I sent a video tape of me impersonating Rosanna, Rosanna Danna to Saturday night live. I was certain they would take one look at my performance and be blown away! You guessed it..Lorne Michaels never called me so I went ahead with plan "B". Jacksonville State University!! (I should have given more thought to plan B??)

8. Good things came from plan B... It led to plan "C". Having a baby then getting married and all before the age of 19. Do you see a theme here? I am not a very good planner!!! But I have learned to roll with the punches!

9. Right now as I type, there are at least 15 wild turkeys running through my back yard. They are very loud and annoying! I should get bonus points for this one.. It’s extremely random.

10. I am the poster child for Romans 8:28 - "We know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose”. I know I keep God on His toes. It amazes me how He has taken my very unplanned plans, A- C, and worked them together for my good.... just because He loves me!

11. I Read a good quote this morning... "The marvel of the Redemptive Reality of God is that the worst and the vilest can never get to the bottom of His love. Paul did not say that God separated him to show what a wonderful man He could make of him, but to reveal His Son in him" Oswald Chambers-
Reality check... once again..It’s not about making me... it's about realizing who we already are through HIM!!!!

12. I am learning to "Rest in God's work" ...When I notice anxiety creeping in, I literally close my eyes and visualize myself pushing whatever the issue is before God's feet. I feel free to enjoy the day and trust that God's in control.

13. When I don’t know what to do... I just do the next thing... most of the time that involves a trip to the dairy queen... Ha!

14. Here's another random thing about me... I love to talk for animals. Let me explain... I might see a horse in a field while driving my daughter to school... I love to start a conversation pretending I am the horse talking to me or another horse... weird, but it just comes so natural for me... I do it without thinking.

15. One crazy thing I did this past Christmas... I auditioned to be on a show that will be airing this year on the Food Network. I have not heard anything yet, and YES, it’s one heck of a long shot. However, it was a wonderful distraction during the Christmas season... which is always so hard for me! Grief makes you do some really crazy things!

16. I also was able to contribute to a book project last year. I wrote one chapter about why I felt led to speak out of tragedy. It was so much fun. I have felt led to write a book, but it seems to be such an overwhelming task... I guess now that I have done one chapter, maybe God will call me to do more?

17. Weird? The bathroom in our master bedroom only has a tub? No shower? Who would do that?

18. My dog's name is Fluke. The reason I named him fluke was because he showed up one day in my front yard and never left. After two weeks of being told not to feed him... I finally gave in... I fed him and thought... what a fluke! It was a total fluke that we had this dog. He still has not left to go back home.

19. I love to cook!

20. I have learned so much through my journey of grief!# 1 lesson- God is real! #2 - What used to matter doesn’t really matter at all... #3 - I got to know myself. #4 - I have more fun...
#5-Relationship are most important to God ... then we will follow the rules! (I used to think it was the other way around and it kept me out of church!)

21. I ask for forgiveness every day...

22. "Is this a masquara worthy day?" - A quote by the one and only, Julie Peck.

23. I love that I came up with that quote because; I didn’t used to cry in front of other people. I have learned that tears show how much we care.

24. One small regret, I wish I had raised my children from the very beginning to love God the way I do today. My heart aches to fully understand now what my role is as a mother. However, God is faithful and can redeem and repair and make new!

25. I cannot wait to go to Heaven. The thought of my family being all together again drives me daily to live this life well…. I can almost feel the amazing hug that is waiting for me!

God Opened Her Eyes

Just then God opened her eyes. She looked. She saw a well of water.
Gen 21:19 (MSG)

Why is it so hard sometimes to study God’s word? Ever heard that whisper early in the morning just before the sun rises? “Come and meet with me.” You feel this tug at your heart persuading you to go to that place where you meet with God. It begs you to get up, and you stay still. Why? Is it because we feel like we are going to be condemned or reprimanded for all the things we did wrong the day before. Constantly saying, I’m sorry! I not perfect! and I tried! Get’s old. You know what I’ve learned when I feel this way, but obey the tug in my heart. I meet a God who opens my eyes, once again, to see how much He loves me.
A couple of days ago I agreed to the early morning invitation, and was amazed by what God showed me. I was reading in Genesis about the story of Hagar and Ishmael. They were asked to leave the only home they had ever known. Sarah felt that Ishmael, Abraham’s illegitimate son, was a threat to her son’s inheritance. Abraham packs Hagar some food and a skin of water and then sends them away. With no time to plan, a devastated Hagar wanders off with her son into the desert of Beersheba. Suddenly she finds herself with a sick and dying son with no water or food to save him. Exhausted and out of hope she is forced to lay him down under a bush to die. Her mother’s heart couldn’t bare to hear him cry when she could do nothing to save him. All she could do now is walk away. I can imagine her body, curled in a tight ball sobbing uncontrollably. When all of a sudden she hears a voice, “What’s wrong, Hagar? Do not be afraid, God has heard the boy cry and knows what is going on. Up now, go get your boy. Hold him tight. I’m going to make him a great nation.” With these words, God opened her eyes. She looks up to see a well of water that would restore her son’s life. God promises Hagar that He will be with Ishmael as he grows up. He lived in the desert of Paran and became a skilled archer. At peace, Hagar leaves her son and goes to Egypt.
At first glance this is a very touching story that shows God’s heart. Take a second glance and your eyes will be opened to see God’s plan. Isn’t it interesting, that Hagar and her son leave with only one skin of water? She wanders off and happens to land in the desert of Beersheba, which in Hebrew means “well of seven springs”. God has her wander to a place that happens to have seven wells of water. Surprisingly when she gets there she’s out of water… ha!! God plans every little detail! She sees no hope for her dehydrated son so lays him under a bush to die. She leaves his side because she cannot bare to watch. She cries out and the Angle of the Lord appears and tells her not to be afraid. He opens her eyes to see the answer to her prayers. The well was there the whole time, she just couldn’t see it. God is the only one that can open our eyes to see the solution to our problems in the desert.
God then gives her the peace to leave her son there with Him to grow up. God teaches Ishmael to become an archer in the desert of paren. An Archer was a skilled warrior that used a Bow and Arrow. In the psalms we read that the bow was a sign that God was in action.
God is always in action! This story gives hope to the mother who is begging God to heal her sick child. It also gives peace to the mother who has lost a child. We never know when our eyes will be opened to see the well. He will lead some to the well of healing water and give others the peace to leave their precious little ones with Him. We wander, but He knows where we must go. While our paths may be different, if we will trust, they will all lead to same destination, our Heavenly home.

Huddle up!

Good morning,
I was inspired to send out some words of encouragement today.. So I emailed all of my girlfriends this morning and wanted you to be a part of it... God bless Julie


OK,

I know you all think that I am crazy any ways so just put up with my idea.....

I was speaking to a friend yesterday that is grieving the death of a child. She broke my heart!She is at the beginning of her journey and is searching for guidance. Her biggest concern was that her family was falling apart. Her and her husband were drifting due to the overwhelming sadness. Her children were avoiding her because looking at her in such a sad state made them painfully aware of reality. Avoidance is a usual mode of defense with grief. It is much easier to look to the distractions of daily life than dealing with ripple effects of the death. She ended our phone conversation with a question, "Why would God allow this to happen to our family after all we have been through?" When I got off of the phone with her I kept thinking to myself how in the world did I get where I am at today???? My journey was not perfect, but my family is still together. Our relationships with one another are surprisingly stronger than before Jack died. If I had to boil it down to one piece of advice for her it would be God. I did not have a relationship with Him at the time of my son's death but began to seek out one with Him selfishly because I wanted to know who was caring for my son. On the other hand, God sought out to have a relationship with me unselfishly to show how much He loved me. He wanted me to be at peace. He did that by placing Godly people in my life to help me along the way. I thought all day about calling her back to tell her not to give up. She needed to know there was an unseen battle being fought over her. The enemy was not God, it was Satan. He not only wanted her paralyzed by grief for the rest of her life, but to destroy her family and the generations to come. She had to change her prospective to see the real enemy. It was time for her to fight back! I fight daily for my family and marriage. The end result gives glory to God and honor's my son. No way do I want to fall into the trap Satan created the night my son went to Heaven. He wanted the death of the Peck family here on earth. My mission is to turn his evil into Good! Stand and proclaim Life instead of death. " I just wanted to express to her with every gasping last breath that over my dead body would I allow Satan to have any glory from Jack's death! My mind kept going to the words huddle up. My friend needed to know that, Now is the time to gather your family together ... Proclaim to them that "We must come together not drift apart!" Would it honor the loved one that has passed to look down from Heaven to see all was destroyed?

I think the message is applicable to all of us on this journey of life. We have got to "Huddle up Girls" and hold each other accountable and encourage one another to live this life, and live it Well! We need to be the mothers and wives that God has called us to be! So today girls I encourage you to "Huddle up!"

Here are the words to a song that captured my spirit today.... Its from Natalie Grant's CD Awaken.....

"Something Beautiful"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oWmK8_T6J8


This is a song for anyone whose ever been knocked down and can't get back again stuck in the corner, can't move forward All alone and you think you're going nowhere this is a song for anyone whose ever stood underneath the sun and felt so small, two feet tall and so out of place He sees you- he knows you- he loves you and wants you to know that...
The life that you've been living, the days that you've been given were made for something beautiful .. Life... Don't let it pass you by .. because you were created for something beautiful... Heaven holds dreams that's just for you and there are things only you can do so step by faith, put the past away... It'll take you to a better day!!!!!

Love you guys..

Julie

I've Found A Golden Ticket

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I have been asked by a dear friend to speak at her women's conference coming up in march. I can not even believe that I am going to be able to share in this event. I am humbled to the point of tears at the thought of being able to do God's work.
I just had a funny thought...

"I found a golden ticket!" remember the movie, "Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory?" I'm Charlie Bucket, the poor but good-hearted boy living with his widowed mother and four bedridden grandparents. He dreams of finding the last golden ticket to be a contestant in an exciting contest. The finders of these special tickets will be given a full tour of Mr. Wonka's world-renowned candy factory and be given a lifetime supply of chocolate.
All of the kids in town are frivolously buying loads of candy bars every day hoping to be the one to find the golden ticket. Poor Charlie,on the other hand, would be grateful to buy just one candy bar. On his way home, Charlie finds a silver coin in the gutter. What a surprise, just enough money to buy two candy bars. He opens the first bar of chocolate , no ticket. Kicking himself for wasting the money, he hopelessly opens the second one... wait.. he's See's something.. A Golden Ticket!!!! He got a ticket to play!!!
Think about it. He won a golden ticket to the best show in town with a coin he did not earn. We find him running through the streets to go and tell his grandfather the unbelievable news. This ticket will change his whole life. Grace begins the story. His hunger to be near Mr. Wonka coupled with his humble spirit wins the contest. Willie Wonka was looking for a willing heart.. Kind of like our God.. He is looking for a willing heart.. I have nothing to bring to the table but a willing heart.. Just like Charlie, I find myself opening a chocolate bar bought with a silver coin I never earned that buys me a ticket the best show in town, "Salvation". I love to be used by God. Always in awe that He would use someone as broken as me. I guess thats how we go from Hollow to Whole!
I am so honored, Justina. Thank you for listening to God and following His direction. This may be the beginning.. a ticket to play! What I have always asked for.. God, I just want a ticket to play...

Dreaming big with God,
Julie Peck

Hollow to Whole

This will be my first post to my first blog spot. I have been meaning to make myself sit down to write my first post, but finding the time to do it seems to be a big problem for me. So, guess what?? I found some time.. actually I am stealing it, I should be working, but I'm not. Please don't tell on me!!!

I am not going to get to deep today.. in fact this is all there is for today!!
Stay tuned, my next one will be a better I promise. Gotta start somewhere!

Covered by grace!
Julie Peck